Discovering Your Values
Discovering your values, or your priorities, is the first place to start, as you figure out what you want from your life, especially once the kids leave home, as your values have probably changed since you became a mumma.
Because when you’re thinking about what comes next, as you set goals, and create new dreams, you wanna make sure they align with who you truly are.
And that’s who you are without societal conditioning – without the beliefs, limitations and BS rules that have been placed on us.
Like starting from a clean slate.
There’s a myriad of ways you can do this – and my 2 faves are VALUES and HUMAN DESIGN.
You could also look at other things like Astrology, the Eannagram, or Clifton Strengths.
Once you understand who you truly are at your core – you’re able to check in and make sure that whatever goals you set or things you want to work towards, match who you are.
So – what are values?
According to Wikipedia, the definition of Values is:
”Values denotes the degree of importance of something or some action, with the aim of determining which actions are best to do or what way is best to live. Values can be defined as broad preferences concerning appropriate courses of actions or outcomes”
I learned how to determine Values and it’s this that I teach my clients – from Dr John DeMartini and he says:
“Knowing your unique hierarchy of values, or highest priorities, is the most important place to start if you intend to expand to the next level of your empowerment.”
Whether you wish to grow your finances, leadership, influence or your business, whether your intention is to transform your relationship, health or any area of your life, it all starts with understanding what’s highest on your Values”
And I agree with him 100%.
We want to create our life in alignment with our values because we always find time, money and motivation for things that are important to us ie. our highest values.
And we tend not to find time, money or have motivation for things that are least important to us – or our lowest values.
My highest values are Career, Family and Travel – and anyone that knows me would agree – as it’s these 3 things I spend the most time doing, talking about, planning and spending my money on.
Are you ready to start discovering your values?
Ok, time to grab that pen and paper:
I have about 13 questions for you to answer -let’s go
Write down no more than 3 answers for each of the below questions – don’t think too much just write down the first thing that springs into you head – trust that your subconscious is offering you the right answer:
- How do you fill your space most? (what’s around your home – awards, souvenirs from travel, flowers, big table to entertain etc) – 3 things only
- How do you mostly spend your time? (in your business travel, with family)
- What energizes you the most? (how and where do you find energy in your life?)
- How do you mostly spend money?
- Where are you most organized and ordered?
- Where are you most disciplined and reliable? (where do you jump out of bed to be or do, what do you never need to be reminded to do?)
- What do you think about most? (not negative self talk or fantasies – about your life)
- What you envision or visualise the most? (again not fantasies but what do you see for your life, slowly & surely coming true)
- What you internally say to yourself the most?
- What do you externally talk about/discuss the most? (topics you want to bring up – where you go from introvert to instant extravert)
- What are you inspired about the most?
- What are the most consistent long term goals you set?
- And the last one – What do you read about or study the most?
- ……..Now you have all your answers, count how many times each “thing” occurs – for example:
Career – 10
Travel – 8
Family – 7
Wealth – 6
Self development – 4
Home – 3
Health and beauty – 1
Your numbers should total 39.
So now you have your values – it’s the top 3 you want to keep in mind when goal setting or creating your life vision.
And it’s also good to note the bottom few as well.
Because you don’t want to be setting a Money goal for example, if money’s bottom of your values list – you won’t be motivated to achieve it, you won’t spend time on it and won’t focus on it.
Write your values down – keep them so you can refer back to them.
Your values can change – and you might find they change once the kids leave home.
If you look at the values you just wrote down – they’re probably different to the values you had before you had kids – and that’s okay – we grow and we evolve.
But it’s good to know your values now – as you plan for the next stage of your life.
And if you are about to enter that next stage in your life, you’re wondering what the heck comes next – maybe you have some ideas but you’re not feeling confident or brave enough to decide and then go after it, I’m your person!
Click here to explore working with me